'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' review

A 150-minute simulation of life in a garbage disposal

By Matt Pais

Metromix
June 23, 2009

 
Critic's Rating:
1

'Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen' review
Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf (Credit: Jaimie Trueblood/Paramount)
Photos:
Shia LaBeouf Shia LaBeouf Megan Fox Josh Duhamel
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Running time:
149 minutes
Rated:
PG-13
Cast:
Shia LaBeouf -
Sam Witwicky
Megan Fox -
Mikaela Barnes
Josh Duhamel -
Capt. Lennox
Tyrese Gibson -
Epps
Kevin Dunn -
Ron Witwicky
See full cast
Director:
Michael Bay
Genre:
Action, Adventure, Science Fiction
Official Movie Web Site:
http://www.transformersmovie.com/
Movie Trailer:
Overall User Rating:
1 1/2 (150 ratings)
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Two years after the original "Transformers" turned a line of toys into a global movie phenomenon, all of our important questions will finally be answered. Will Sam (Shia LaBeouf) and Mikaela (Megan Fox) have the guts to—giggle!—say the L word? Has the orange babe (Isabel Lucas) lusting after Sam at college been tanning or bathing in Cheetos? Can the friendly Autobots defeat the evil Decepticons without smashing holes in the planet? Will this ringing in my ears ever go away?

The buzz: The entertaining "Transformers" wasn't the world's smartest movie, but its sexiness and rock 'em sock 'em destruction more than satisfied the base desires of the 10-year-old mind. Now moderation-phobic director Michael Bay returns for the sequel with a gargantuan running time that still falls a half-hour shy of "Pearl Harbor." LaBeouf suffered a serious hand injury during filming—hopefully audiences won't find the movie nearly as painful.

The verdict: Delivering noise as pointless as a chainsaw on a chalkboard, "Revenge of the Fallen" has no plan for its spectacle other than Bigger, Louder, MORE! That might suit the mood of anyone juiced up to Manny Ramirez levels, but even they won't stomach pathetic gags like Sam's mom accidentally eating pot brownies, a small robot humping Mikaela's leg or the huge machines uttering lines like, "Punk-ass, Decepticon," and, "It feels good to grab your flesh." Forget fun; watching this endless, incomprehensible assault is like losing a barfight.

Did you know? In one of the film's many, many laughably preposterous moments, a veteran robot (with a Scottish accent!) tells Sam about heroic Autobots who sacrificed themselves to create a tomb made of their very own bodies. Just think about that for a second.

Check for showtimes of "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" in IMAX

Video: Watch Matt's review of "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen"

What other people are saying...

No-pic-chick

chickenkicker from Cold Spring - July 14, 2009 at 8:13 AM

Well, I finally got around to seeing this last weekend and I loved it. Like PP said, it's about good robots fighting bad robots. If you are looking...

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REDAWN from Wilton Manors - July 01, 2009 at 9:59 AM

I still have to see this and asked my fiance to take me to IMAX to see it tonight or tomorrow night.

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jeffwilstead from hood - June 27, 2009 at 2:39 AM

There is only one good thing about this movie. Megan Fox's boobs jiggling when she runs.

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JKU from Reno - June 26, 2009 at 12:06 PM

This movie was awesome. It's a movie about robots fighting. That's what you get. What else were you expecting?

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JohnThom from Greenville and upstate - June 26, 2009 at 11:28 AM

yeah, absolutely no one other than an idiot would expect this movie to be ANYTHING it is or intended for. It's a summer movie with loud noises and ...

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